Finding..... I have noticed that often times when we find someone they might not be ready to be found.
By experience I want to say all of the guys I've been with in the past are not terrible people, no far from it but if there's one thing I have noticed is almost every guy who walks up to a girl is looking for one already made.
Not every guy is willing to work the process of refining, for instance, not everyone has the opportunity to witness a gold they're about to buy being refined 99% of the people who use and buy gold buy them already made.
Honestly having to wait for a gold to be refined could be pretty difficult if not impossible, or unnecessary, why wait, when you can get an already refined one, why stand the heat? why watch it burn? why why why?
And I'm not saying they're men who are not waiting, of course there are many who wait, who watch, who nurture, who sees the future right from the unprocessed gold.
There's this notion that a woman should be perfect should have the skills of marriage should know what to do at every given point in time.
One particular ex of mine was always good with the what ifs, he will always say to me what if we get married is this what you're going to do? what if we are faced with this situation is this what you're going to do ?there was so many what ifs that I even began to doubt my very existence as a woman and then it hit me
I wasn't perfect... the moment a woman is born she does not know anything about being a woman she learned it at every stage in her life.... A new mother learns how to be a mother when she has a child...A new bride learns how to be a wife once she becomes a wife, there is never a full knowledge about it before the experience there might be knowledge but trust me experience is always the best teacher.
Yes it's good to prepare before you walk in it's good to know what you're in for before you walk in, but do you start judging an 18 years old girl, or a 24-30 years old woman because you knew your mother well when she was almost 45 or more?
Who told you marriage was ever easy for her in the first place? who told you it was easy at first to manage all of you at home? who told you your mother was perfect maybe she is now but was she from the beginning?
We can only hope for the best but we can never know the ending by just looking at the beginning 90% of the time that's totally impossible.
I love this post. We're all unfinished products, but with the help of a spouse, through much effort and time, we can slowly become more complete, more refined, and more perfect. Exponential growth is more likely to occur in the context of marriage where both parties are supporting and encouraging individual growth, and at times challenging each other to grow.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you agree, one can never be perfect or truly ready, some qualities come with time, we all started from not walking at all before we started running....
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